Post by jennygalif on May 24, 2017 8:47:05 GMT -5
Hi!! I have a friend (gay) and he is my best friend for more than 10 years.
Recently there were problems in our relationship and I feel really bad.
The problem started a few months ago and it is till now that he got angry with me very easily. I tried to talk with him but he was a bit ironic and became more angry so I stopped. A couple of montgs ago he met a man and has a relationship with him. I didn’t like him much, I thought he was “too little” for my friend but I said nothing not to hurt him or influence him negatively. On the contrary I tried to encourage him, to support him in many ways although I felt pressed cause I didn’t do them with pleasure. But I believe that if you love sb you must be next to him and try for him to be happy. If he is happy I am happy too. I invited lots of times in my house for dinner and watch a movie or play board games, I organized trips, etc.
However, I felt awkward and embarrassed many times. When they were in my house they started kissing and hugging and showing love opinion front of me and I felt that I bothered them. I did’ not say anything because I was afraid that he would be mad at me and I thought that maybe I was exaggerated. However, as the time passed I started getting mad because my friend’s boyfriend ate and drank in my house, never brought anything, a bottle of wine, or a little ice cream and whenever we went on a trip or coffee he never opened his wallet or offered to buy us sth. I know that he has no money, now he doesn’t work, but I think it is his fault. He had a job and quitted then found another and he left. He is 35 years old. Ok, I thought that maybe my friend and him had made an agreement that he is not going to pay because he has no money, but what about me? Why he goes out for coffee with friends? I do not want an expensive present, just a rose, a chocolate sth cheap.
Now I do not want to go our with them, I tried to say that to my friend without saying anything about his boyfriend, I just told him I feel pressed from work, but he got mad at me and he doesn’t soeak to me. What can I do? Am I exaggerated? Am I wrong with my thoughts? I cannot tell him the truth he will get hurt. However, I don' t want this to continue. I feel trapped. I love my friend, but... I do not know how to handle this.
Thank you!!!
Jenny
Recently there were problems in our relationship and I feel really bad.
The problem started a few months ago and it is till now that he got angry with me very easily. I tried to talk with him but he was a bit ironic and became more angry so I stopped. A couple of montgs ago he met a man and has a relationship with him. I didn’t like him much, I thought he was “too little” for my friend but I said nothing not to hurt him or influence him negatively. On the contrary I tried to encourage him, to support him in many ways although I felt pressed cause I didn’t do them with pleasure. But I believe that if you love sb you must be next to him and try for him to be happy. If he is happy I am happy too. I invited lots of times in my house for dinner and watch a movie or play board games, I organized trips, etc.
However, I felt awkward and embarrassed many times. When they were in my house they started kissing and hugging and showing love opinion front of me and I felt that I bothered them. I did’ not say anything because I was afraid that he would be mad at me and I thought that maybe I was exaggerated. However, as the time passed I started getting mad because my friend’s boyfriend ate and drank in my house, never brought anything, a bottle of wine, or a little ice cream and whenever we went on a trip or coffee he never opened his wallet or offered to buy us sth. I know that he has no money, now he doesn’t work, but I think it is his fault. He had a job and quitted then found another and he left. He is 35 years old. Ok, I thought that maybe my friend and him had made an agreement that he is not going to pay because he has no money, but what about me? Why he goes out for coffee with friends? I do not want an expensive present, just a rose, a chocolate sth cheap.
Now I do not want to go our with them, I tried to say that to my friend without saying anything about his boyfriend, I just told him I feel pressed from work, but he got mad at me and he doesn’t soeak to me. What can I do? Am I exaggerated? Am I wrong with my thoughts? I cannot tell him the truth he will get hurt. However, I don' t want this to continue. I feel trapped. I love my friend, but... I do not know how to handle this.
Thank you!!!
Jenny
