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Post by Ask Anon on Dec 23, 2016 14:47:41 GMT -5
I'd be guessing as we just don't know ...
I suspect he's being sucked into his family / pre-student life, which doesn't necessarily mean problems for your relationship. It's not unusual for people to have college mode and home mode, especially in their first year.
I'd step back a bit and give him some space and see what happens next year. Tough, I know, but chasing him won't help - let him chase you.
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Post by Ask Anon on Jan 5, 2017 10:33:25 GMT -5
My plan right now is to kinda act cold and distant so that he sees that he did something wrong, and if he likes me he'll pursue me Mind games are the quickest way ever to destroy trust, and passive-aggressive behaviour scores a close second. You seem to planning a combination attack. Stop beating yourself up, stop making assumptions and letting your imagination work overtime: drop it until term restarts. Then act like an adult and ask him WTF was going on, and ask if he'd rather you left him alone. If you care, then be honest, even be angry. I would be. But don't be the one who destroys the relationship. Maybe he wants out; maybe his parents are controlling, maybe something utterly different. If YOU want out, that's fine; but if you don't, give him chance to explain himself - if he wants to. |
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Post by Ask Anon on Jan 5, 2017 14:00:24 GMT -5
I sensed that a large measure of the problem was anxiety; just tell your brain to slow down! More importantly, obviously I don't know the guy, but I do know that, generally, male texting patterns are very different from female. Leaving conversations incomplete is quite normal, not responding as fast is almost universal. Guys - generally - don't see texting as central to their lives. I'm sure that's part of the problem; your hyperactive brain filling in the spaces is another! A failure to respond could be due to a million different reasons; Occam's Razor suggests "Among competing hypotheses, the one with the fewest assumptions should be selected" - not the most negative! Take it easy  |
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Post by Ask Anon on Jan 6, 2017 9:23:43 GMT -5
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Post by Gina99 on Jan 7, 2017 2:02:04 GMT -5
He is driving you crazy, not respecting your plans, not communicating effectively, and frankly it seems like he is not into you like you are with him. Stop obsessing over him and spending so much energy and time analyzing his every move and non-move. If he has been this way for months it is not going to get any better. Let it go and set your sights elsewhere.
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Post by Gina99 on Jan 8, 2017 21:26:30 GMT -5
'friend asked if everything was okay between him and I and he said that he thinks we're moving fast. This is so weird considering we haven't seen each other in a month'
It isn't weird if he doesn't want a relationship with you. His friend is in a bad position , put in the middle. Mike should just let you know how he feels but he is a coward. You need to let this go.
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Post by Ask Anon on Jan 9, 2017 6:35:30 GMT -5
This is all a bit unfair on Mike.
Go back to the start. You have a crush on him. You've had one time together. You don't own him, but you are treating him as if you've been going steady for a year and he's gone cold on you.
This isn't Mike. It's you.
You've been harassing him non-stop over the holiday period, and now you wonder why he's gone cold: This is no way to treat a guy, and if you don't change your ways and curb your enthusiasm, you're going to have major problems in all your relationships.
Slow down, back off, step away from the guy, and remember you aren't engaged. You aren't even going steady. You had a friend, and you've overloaded the friendship. No guy in the world will take it. Really.
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Post by Ask Anon on Jan 11, 2017 6:34:16 GMT -5
Original posts deleted.
Truth hurts, huh?
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