Post by aamfp99 on Sept 27, 2017 11:11:02 GMT -5
I have a good friend that I've known for a while now--maybe 5 years. She used to be overweight for a period of time due to stress (eating was a coping mechanism for her), and she dated a guy for a couple years who cheated on her 3 times and often insulted her appearance.
About 2 years ago, she decided to lose weight and has lost at least 100 pounds. Initially, I was fine with it and was very supportive, but she has changed a lot. She is definitely at a very healthy weight now (somewhere between 124 and 130--and she's 30 years old), but she seems obsessed with counting calories and weight loss and obesity. She measures everything she eats, often using a scale made for measuring food, and logs everything she eats into an app on her phone. She refers to her past self as a "fatass" at times, and admits she hated her "fat" self and blames her "being a fatass" for some of her health problems. It's...disturbing to me to see her/hear her say things like that about herself. She has made numerous comments about how "fat" her thighs are still (which they aren't) as well.
I posted a joke on Facebook about how farts burn so many calories--it was just a joke, and I didn't even have her in mind when I posted it. She made a rather rant-like response stating the difference between the 2 types of calories (small cal and something else, I can't remember) and what the actual calorie burn would be to lose a pound of fat through farting. It was only a joke post, and I didn't post it to trigger anyone, I swear. But she went all Nazi-like about calories and weight loss.
I've also noticed her make rude comments about overweight people. One time, we went to the Mansfield Reformatory Haunted House event, and there was this part of it where you step on a panel in the floor, and it made this fake creature pop out from the side of the wall and make a loud noise. Later, she said that the noise was louder and laster longer if someone overweight stood on the panel and laughed about it.
Just this year, when I went to visit her and her fiance during Easter, she made a comment about woman and laughed as she said it: "I can't tell if she's pregnant or just fat." She never used to be like this, and I can't see how making fun of overweight people is a "healthy" part of a weight loss journey.
She has admitted she hates social events now that involve food in anyway because the food tends to be unhealthy almost all the time and went on a rant about how people are obsessed with associating food with parties and events, and that's part of the reason there are so many overweight people. She wouldn't even have a small slice of cake at one office party because it would ruin her calorie count for that day.
I'm not overweight and never have been, so this isn't a jealousy thing at all--I'm not the only one who's shown concern as at least one other close friend of ours has made comments about this obsession of hers. My friend just brushes it off and says she has it all under control if someone expresses concern. It's gotten the point where her obsessive, almost aggressive, stance on counting calories and losing weight make me uncomfortable to eat anything around her. I feel like she judges me and everyone else she sees on how they look, what they eat, etc.
I'm very concerned she's developing or has developed some sort of eating disorder. I'm glad she lost weight and is healthy now, but I'm worried she isn't going to stop and will become anorexic or something.
Is there any advice anyone has on how I can approach her about this? Or is it too late or out of my hands now?
About 2 years ago, she decided to lose weight and has lost at least 100 pounds. Initially, I was fine with it and was very supportive, but she has changed a lot. She is definitely at a very healthy weight now (somewhere between 124 and 130--and she's 30 years old), but she seems obsessed with counting calories and weight loss and obesity. She measures everything she eats, often using a scale made for measuring food, and logs everything she eats into an app on her phone. She refers to her past self as a "fatass" at times, and admits she hated her "fat" self and blames her "being a fatass" for some of her health problems. It's...disturbing to me to see her/hear her say things like that about herself. She has made numerous comments about how "fat" her thighs are still (which they aren't) as well.
I posted a joke on Facebook about how farts burn so many calories--it was just a joke, and I didn't even have her in mind when I posted it. She made a rather rant-like response stating the difference between the 2 types of calories (small cal and something else, I can't remember) and what the actual calorie burn would be to lose a pound of fat through farting. It was only a joke post, and I didn't post it to trigger anyone, I swear. But she went all Nazi-like about calories and weight loss.
I've also noticed her make rude comments about overweight people. One time, we went to the Mansfield Reformatory Haunted House event, and there was this part of it where you step on a panel in the floor, and it made this fake creature pop out from the side of the wall and make a loud noise. Later, she said that the noise was louder and laster longer if someone overweight stood on the panel and laughed about it.
Just this year, when I went to visit her and her fiance during Easter, she made a comment about woman and laughed as she said it: "I can't tell if she's pregnant or just fat." She never used to be like this, and I can't see how making fun of overweight people is a "healthy" part of a weight loss journey.
She has admitted she hates social events now that involve food in anyway because the food tends to be unhealthy almost all the time and went on a rant about how people are obsessed with associating food with parties and events, and that's part of the reason there are so many overweight people. She wouldn't even have a small slice of cake at one office party because it would ruin her calorie count for that day.
I'm not overweight and never have been, so this isn't a jealousy thing at all--I'm not the only one who's shown concern as at least one other close friend of ours has made comments about this obsession of hers. My friend just brushes it off and says she has it all under control if someone expresses concern. It's gotten the point where her obsessive, almost aggressive, stance on counting calories and losing weight make me uncomfortable to eat anything around her. I feel like she judges me and everyone else she sees on how they look, what they eat, etc.
I'm very concerned she's developing or has developed some sort of eating disorder. I'm glad she lost weight and is healthy now, but I'm worried she isn't going to stop and will become anorexic or something.
Is there any advice anyone has on how I can approach her about this? Or is it too late or out of my hands now?
