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Post by rawrimasloth on Sept 18, 2017 20:29:07 GMT -5
So I'm a sophomore in high school and I'm a very shy person like I get mad anxiety when I see a cute girl none the less talk to one. But during my freshman year of highschool their was this girl in one of my classes she was shy like me really cute looking and most people didn't pay attention to her .At lunch I noticed she sat with one of her female friends almost every day. After that year of awfulness with its ups and downs I've now gained a little self confidence in my self with changing my looks and a new way of looking at life. The only issue is now I have a little confidence but she isn't in any of my classes and I only see her in short 5 second intervals from when I'm entering or walking to my math class. I want to approach her and be like "I think your cute we should talk sometime" but I don't know if it'll do anything or just come off creepy I mean she doesn't even know I exist I've talked to her maybe once and that was because we were put in a group together for a class. I am pretty sure she's single and I really want to ask her out but just asking her out without even having her know my name is too much isn't it? Idk what to do I'm confused and lonely and she is the one I want to be with but I don't know how or when to start up a conversation with her. I've debated waiting till next year to see if we get in the same class but I think that's too long idk please help me I need advice!!!
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Post by russiantrainwreck on Sept 18, 2017 21:03:19 GMT -5
Hi, since you have a problem talking to her face to face why don't you try sending her a note or an actual letter somehow? It'll give you time to think about what to put down and If you say that you were too shy to talk to her she might relate since she's shy too. It's very romantic too!
Feel free to ignore my reply haha
Good luck my friend!
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Post by rawrimasloth on Sept 18, 2017 21:29:48 GMT -5
Thanks for the reply it's a good idea I'll take it into consideration but doing that I feel will be a really big challenge since I have no way of getting it to her? But I'll think more on it thank you!!!
All I know is I want to say something to her idk if I wanna just introduce myself or ask her to go see a movie, ask for her number or just say like "we should talk sometime" or something. I'm just a anxious teen in need of help XD
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Post by Ask Anon on Sept 19, 2017 3:41:34 GMT -5
You don't need to go from 'not talking' to dating in one step.
Start by making eye contact and wave or say hi as you pass. If you get the opportunity to have a coffee or something non-threatening, use that.
What I'm saying is, stop thinking 'girlfriend' and start thinking 'girl friend'.
That's always the best first step, especially if you are both shy.
Think about it; you're not talking now, when there's no pressure. You get to ask her out, and you will the n HAVE to talk to her for the first time, and the pressure will be 10x. Make a friend before you even think about asking her out.
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Post by Gina99 on Sept 19, 2017 11:57:56 GMT -5
Exactly. Walking up to someone for the first time and saying 'You're cute' is a little creepy. Start with smiling in class and saying hi as you pass in the hallway. You have spent way to much time thinking about this girl and not trying to just be friendly. Also practice small talk with girls you aren't interested in-girls who sit next to you in class, girlfriends of your friends, etc. The more you practice the better you will be with girls you are attracted to. Join clubs at school too. It will be easy to talk to girls with whom you share an interest like sports, chess, computer games, etc
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Post by rawrimasloth on Sept 19, 2017 12:37:32 GMT -5
Thanks for all the replys! I still am confused but now I have a little more of s direction on what I should do I think I'm a helpless case but maybe I'm not  I'm not the type of person to really do stuff in more or the person who sits back and just watched as other people's life progresses and i was just tired of sitting back and watching everyone's life progress with mine sitting here at a halt. I'm probably just gonna give up everyone s already routing for one of my friends to go and ask her out so I think I will just rout for him to accomplishi what I wish I could I'm not content with my life but I guess I'll just have to live with it in very glad that I posted this on this board it has helped me not go out and embarrass myself in public |
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Post by Ask Anon on Sept 19, 2017 12:40:55 GMT -5
Fatal error.
If you haven't even got the courage to say hi, why should she go out with you?
And if she does, you start with a third person in the relationship from Day 1.
Probably the single worst move you can make. If that's what you feel, you might as well ask your Mom to ask her out. Exactly; that would be crazy. But what's the difference?
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Post by rawrimasloth on Sept 19, 2017 12:51:26 GMT -5
No your misenterpeiting what I meant XD my friend likes the same girl and everyone's is routing for him and her to go out sorry if my wording was off. But I totally agree if I can't even say hi what's the point in even thinking I'd have a chance XD
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Post by rawrimasloth on Sept 19, 2017 13:32:29 GMT -5
I don't wanna be that person who can't even say hi I have at least a little pride in myself but I can't think of what I would say or how to make it not come off as creepy. if we were in a similar class it would be a lot easier but unfortunately that's not the case for me. I know courage isn't something that can be given but I just don't know what I would say especially with the window of time provided.
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Post by Ask Anon on Sept 19, 2017 17:57:33 GMT -5
Sorry, I misunderstood.
Anyway, you need to think what you have in common. Any classes? Anything?
But just a smile and hello once or twice, then third time ask her a question that she might say 'yes' to - "Are you interested in ... ?"
A direct honest approach is by far the best way; it avoids an misunderstanding about what you want / don't want, for a start.
And you shouldn't be discussing her with anyone before you speak to her.
Why? Because it increases the pressure on you, and - if it gets back to her - it will likely cause confusion and misunderstanding.
Faint heart never won fair maid.
Talk to her. I guarantee she won't bite.
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Post by Gina99 on Sept 19, 2017 18:50:10 GMT -5
Since you don't have classes together you can still smile or say hi while passing in the hall. Start there. Meanwhile do the same with someone else and my other suggestions still stand
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Post by rawrimasloth on Sept 19, 2017 20:21:52 GMT -5
Thanks for all the advice I'll try the smileing and saying hi starting the next time I see her I'll keep my eye out |
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I'm not the type of person to really do stuff in more or the person who sits back and just watched as other people's life progresses and i was just tired of sitting back and watching everyone's life progress with mine sitting here at a halt. I'm probably just gonna give up everyone s already routing for one of my friends to go and ask her out so I think I will just rout for him to accomplishi what I wish I could