Post by okayups on Jul 25, 2016 14:46:30 GMT -5
I'm not normally the one to talk about my problems but I am so confused about life recently that I really don't have anywhere to turn to.
I recently graduated out of high school and I'm extremely lost. Although I was a hard worker, I wasn't the best student I was mostly average. I had intense family issues all throughout high school that made a huge impact on my performance. Although I got accepted to some schools and I should be blessed that I have an opportunity. I can't help but want what I can't have and it's ruining my life.
I'm watching all my high school friends attend the same school and starting a really exciting part of their lives and I'm happy for them but I can't help but wonder why I'm not there along with them. I've been feeling sorry for myself for the last six months and it's ruining my life. I'm becoming envious and jealous and I've never been like this before but I wanted something badly and I didn't get it.
I'm confused my life because despite being average, my goal was very reachable and I still didn't reach it. I know I shouldn't be worried about other people but I find myself questioning their character. I'm watching people who I've seen cheat through high school attend college and it's driving me crazy. I was such a pushover during high school and I ended up doing a whole group project alone with one of my classmates and she's the one attending college. I'm really stuck because I never gave up my integrity and honesty and I tried to be a good person and be fair and life still trampled me.
I don't expect anything from being a decent person I just thought that whatever you put in the universe will come back you.
For the last four years I've been putting my happiness towards the future, telling myself that I'll reach my goal and it won't matter how hard it was to get there. I placed my happiness towards the future and I ended up empty handed and its really doing a toll on me.
I know everything happens for a reason but I feel awful and I feel like NO REASON is worth this disappointment and loss of hope. I lost my hope and my fight and now I'm just confused.
I'm trying to attend community college but I've been distancing myself from my friends because I need to learn how to be alone when they all leave.
I wake up every morning trying to understand why things happen the way they do. I'm a strong believer of fate but I can't get over the things I can't have.
I have this CRAZY mindset that wants whatever I can't have. I wanted to go to that school after I was rejected. I didn't even consider it as an option but after I was told I couldn't have it, I desperately wanted it. I knew deep down it wouldn't make me happy but the moment someone told me I couldn't have it. I ended up wanted it more.
I'm fine with community college but I'm scared of being alone. It would be the perfect place for me because I don't know what I want but I did get accepted to other places.
I'm being lead directly to another door but I'm scared of walking though it.
I recently graduated out of high school and I'm extremely lost. Although I was a hard worker, I wasn't the best student I was mostly average. I had intense family issues all throughout high school that made a huge impact on my performance. Although I got accepted to some schools and I should be blessed that I have an opportunity. I can't help but want what I can't have and it's ruining my life.
I'm watching all my high school friends attend the same school and starting a really exciting part of their lives and I'm happy for them but I can't help but wonder why I'm not there along with them. I've been feeling sorry for myself for the last six months and it's ruining my life. I'm becoming envious and jealous and I've never been like this before but I wanted something badly and I didn't get it.
I'm confused my life because despite being average, my goal was very reachable and I still didn't reach it. I know I shouldn't be worried about other people but I find myself questioning their character. I'm watching people who I've seen cheat through high school attend college and it's driving me crazy. I was such a pushover during high school and I ended up doing a whole group project alone with one of my classmates and she's the one attending college. I'm really stuck because I never gave up my integrity and honesty and I tried to be a good person and be fair and life still trampled me.
I don't expect anything from being a decent person I just thought that whatever you put in the universe will come back you.
For the last four years I've been putting my happiness towards the future, telling myself that I'll reach my goal and it won't matter how hard it was to get there. I placed my happiness towards the future and I ended up empty handed and its really doing a toll on me.
I know everything happens for a reason but I feel awful and I feel like NO REASON is worth this disappointment and loss of hope. I lost my hope and my fight and now I'm just confused.
I'm trying to attend community college but I've been distancing myself from my friends because I need to learn how to be alone when they all leave.
I wake up every morning trying to understand why things happen the way they do. I'm a strong believer of fate but I can't get over the things I can't have.
I have this CRAZY mindset that wants whatever I can't have. I wanted to go to that school after I was rejected. I didn't even consider it as an option but after I was told I couldn't have it, I desperately wanted it. I knew deep down it wouldn't make me happy but the moment someone told me I couldn't have it. I ended up wanted it more.
I'm fine with community college but I'm scared of being alone. It would be the perfect place for me because I don't know what I want but I did get accepted to other places.
I'm being lead directly to another door but I'm scared of walking though it.
